VOID & HOBBIES

With all of my close friends officially moved out of San Diego, life just hasn't felt the same for me. I hate to be a Debbie Downer, but I feel like I am back to square one again. You know all the loneliness I was feeling before I moved back down to San Diego? Its back, but in a smaller amount. Its such a shame honestly. I know the things that make my soul happy and complete, and yet I can never wrap my hands around all of those things at once. Maybe that complete feeling can last days, weeks, sometimes months. But I feel like it is not an everlasting feeling, and it really just sucks. I hate feeling like something is missing, like there is a void that I can never fill.

So the simple option would be to reconnect with other friends and make new friends. And I have been doing that. It just kind of sucks pestering people to ask when they are going to do things, and asking them not to forget to include me. I just know people like doing group things, and I no longer have a group of people to invite. At the same time I guess I could be more aggressive in hanging out one-on-one with people which would lead to more group hangouts, meeting new people, and establishing deeper relationships as a result. Actually, that will be my goal for September. And in terms of meeting new people, I signed up for a dodge ball league. Yes, good old fashion dodge ball which is one of my favorite things on this earth. No, I cannot throw a ball. Hopefully, I can dodge a wrench. I honestly am not that great at dodge ball, but I love playing! So playing I will do, starting two weeks from now.


On top of my 40-hour work week (which work has been better, but still boring), my Spanish classes 3 hours a week, and whatever else I do in between then, I've picked up a new hobby. This hobby is actually a life-time hobby that I've decided to do more often--in fact daily. Writing is my hobby! And I'm sure you're saying blogging isn't writing or if writing is your hobby then why aren't you blogging every day.

I want to be 100% real here:

Sometimes I feel like blogging is just like putting on a broadcast. You are writing what you want, but you are doing it in a way to seem appealing. I find myself getting tired from doing that. I just want to live my life and enjoy the moments without wondering if I am typing something that sounds cool, or taking a good picture. I simply want to write what I think and how I feel. And I've been doing this forever! Since the tender age of eight I've kept a diary, in some way or form. I used to run a website before blogging became popular. I still have the passwords for two livejournal accounts that have been in existence for almost 10 years. These journals are my babies. Besides being my outlet in which I could express myself and document everyday occurrences of my life, they have been a marker. Every now and then I go back and read old entries and I can see how much I have grown in how I think, how I handle situations, and overall as a person.

And lately, I've been having so many ideas swirling around in my head, and I just been wanting to write them down. And so I have, except this time not in a journal, but in the form of a book. or two. or three. Yes, I am in the process of writing a book series. Well, I'm on the first book haha. Its fun, its exciting, its allowing me to be creative, and expand a hobby thats been near and dear to me since I was a little girl.

Another inkling I've had is the desire to leave my mark on the world. I guess that is another part of why my void is so big. Yes, my job is rewarding and I feel a sense of gratification most days. But I want a physical representation of 'my mark'. A published paper, book, non-profit organization, product, kit, or whatever it may be that I decided to do. And even if all that becomes of it one person reading my book then that is more then enough. Knowing that I used my God give talents and passions  to produce something physical to give back to this world, would definitely help fill one puzzle of this void.

No that doesn't mean I am leaving this blog. I will still definitely be updating. This after all, is another favorite hobby of mine. Just know that sometimes my hands (and head) might be more focused on a different writing activity, that I hope to share with you all in the near future.

CAREER TALK: MY FIVE YEAR PLAN

I've never been the type of person that considered myself "career-focused". I always wanted a job/position that I enjoyed, but didn't dominate the rest of my life. I know some people eat, breathe, and sleep work. They don't mind putting in endless hours and having their whole life revolved around their job. And they think about jumping to the next position and not stopping until they see themselves at the top of the ladder. I've always respected those people, but never thought I could ever be like that. I'm very true to my Libra ways in that I like my life to be balanced in every aspect.  Too much of one thing in my life definitely throws me off, especially work.

I've been at my new job now for not even a month and a half yet, and I'm already thinking whats next in my career. Did I just say that? I thought being back in this city and having a job that pays me a little more would allow to feel satisfied. And yet I am thinking about where I see myself in a few years from now and what I need to do get there. What type of job do I want? How much money would I like to make? What type of experience do I need? What other licenses or certificates should I get? These are just a few questions that I have been asking myself and researching. And then I thought to myself, I am that career-focused person that I said I could never be. I mean seriously who thinks that after being at their new job for only six weeks. And you know what, I enjoy being this way. Its not just my job but myself over all. I think I've entered this state in my life of improving myself in every way possible, and it feels damn good.

So what are my plans exactly? I mean I am not completely sure even though I have my ideas. So far I am thinking of using my experience and registration to eventually end up in the occupational health and safety field. Honestly, its really not too different from what I am doing now. Actually my position now will give me great experience for the health & safety field. There are just a different set of laws I need to learn. I do not want to be on the regulatory side like I have in the past, but I would like to work for an agency or company as a safety analyst or safety officer to make sure they are in compliance for inspections.  For the most part this career pays more and in the salary range that I wish to be making. And overall there seems to be more jobs in this field that I could apply to. I think it would be a smart and not so difficult career move. But of course there is still research to be done. Right now, I will continue my research as I still continue to learn the ins and outs of my current position.

WHEN IN TIJUANA....

(Yes, this is how you simply walk into Mexico)

This past Friday, I took a trip across the border to Tijuana with a few friends.  My house is less than 20 miles from the international border, and yet I forget about it all the time. Some people make the commute between Tijuana and San Diego daily. I have friends that once lived in Tijuana and now live in San Diego, or friends that are originally from San Diego that now live in Tijuana. I admit that I am often caught up in my SD lifestyle that I forget about our sister city south of the border.

         ( I should have written "Gracias Tijuana por un buen tiempo")

Now, my original thoughts about TJ are similar to what everyone else thought. It's dangerous. The police are going to give me a hard time because I am American. Its going to be grimy but great for cheap alcohol. I might never make it home alive. After living in San Diego, it was five years before I crossed the border into Tijuana with an ex-boyfriend. We actually drove past Tijuana and to Ensenada for some wine tasting. But boy do I remember freaking out! Upon crossing the border I definitely felt like I was in a different Country. The change between countries was immediate and overwhelming. As I took more and more trips across the border, I started to feel more comfortable with Tijuana. What I once thought of as "dangerous Mexico", slowly but surely grew on me in many ways.

 

(Outside of Food Garden)

This past Friday I fell more in love with Tijuana. I visited a new part of the city called Zona Rio, which immediately gave me flashbacks to Mexico City-- Huge streets, round-a-bouts, monuments! Zona Rio was lined with many restaurants and bars, and I was surprised by how fancy and clean the area was. We decided to eat at a place called Food Garden. I would describe it as an outside cafeteria where there are a bunch different food stands to choose from. I had the most delicious Chilaquiles (which I had for the first time in Mexico city), and my friends enjoyed their food as well. To be honest, we kind of died and went to heaven over how amazing the food was. Overall the place is super cute and super hipster, and definitely something I would see in San Diego. Tijuana is definitely changing and I am liking it! After Food Garden, we did a bar crawl and had a few drinks at some really cool bars. It was a great time and I enjoyed exploring this Metropolis that is only a hop and skip away. I will definitely be making the trip across the border more often!


And on a random note, did you know there is a huge statue of Abraham Lincoln in Tijuana? Because there definitely is.

UHH, COMO SE DICE?

So my latest venture and current way to "improve myself"  has been taking Spanish classes. I'm already three classes deep and I am loving every second of it. In case you didn't know, I am kinda obsessed with Latin American culture. The language, the music, the people, everything about the culture just mesmerizes me. I am planning to volunteer in Central or South America either Spring or Summer 2015, so I thought it would make sense to start practicing my espanol. Right now I am taking two classes a week both 1.5 hours, and am looking forward to seeing how much I improve over the next few months. It would be my dream to become fluent, but I know that's hard considering I am not listening/speaking Spanish everyday.

I started taking Spanish in middle school all the way through high school. I think by the time I graduated HS I had taken 5 years worth of Spanish. I really did enjoy each and everyone of my Spanish teachers and classes. In fact I was so good in Spanish 3 Honors, that my teacher nominated me for this student of the year award haha. I didn't really start practicing again until I started dating my ex (his mom is from Guatemala and half of his family lives in Tijuana). Just from spending time over his house and hearing his family speak, I was starting to pick up on stuff. And then I started my job as an Environmental Health Specialist. I would say that 70% of restaurants I inspected were Mexican and 95% of the time there were employees that did not speak English. In order to do my job properly I started studying a language translation book provided by my job and starting speaking implying it in my restaurants. My operators were telling me how helpful it was that I spoke Spanish, and every time I practiced at work I would pick up on new words or sayings. And now I am in a position where I don't need to use Spanish anymore. But I still want to learn and continue to get better.

Mi Maestra (my teacher) is originally from Mexico City and I really enjoy how she teaches the class. It is VERY interactive which is exactly what I need. Since the class limit is 5 people, it forces you to have to speak or answer questions (instead of just blending in the background). The biggest thing I need to work on is conversing and speaking out loud. Usually, I get so nervous when someone asks me a question in Spanish....I kind of just freeze up. So I love that I get to talk and practice out loud and not feel dumb. I think what takes off a lot of the pressure is the fact that I am taking the classes because I want to, not because I have to, and I am not being graded! Its definitely allowed me to participate more then I used to when I was in school. Plus in addition to small workbook exercises we watch a lot of videos/movies which keeps it fun and interesting.

And on that note I am heading to Tijuana this evening to try out some new restaurants and practice my Spanish, wish me luck!

NEW GOODIES

With me moving to San Diego, I decided it was time to remove all the unnecessary clutter I was harboring in my apartment. I went through every drawer, inch of my closet, and forbidden space beneath my bed and asked myself "When is the last time I used this?" It wasn't much surprise that I hadn't used/worn most of the items in months and for the most part forgotten they had even existed. So out went paperwork, clothes, and other random objects I had collected over the past few years. I was more astonished over how much more crap I had gained while living on my own. But out went garbage bags full of stuff either in the trash or to be donated. Let me just say that it is not hard for me to throw stuff away. (I blame my parents, they are opposite of hoarders.) Once I was done de-cluttering and moved into my new apartment, I felt like I didn't have anything. My closet and drawers looked empty and I really was living the feeling OMG I don't have anything to wear. 

The past few weeks my goal has been to replenish my closet with new duds. I will be 25 in September, so I am all about entering my mid-20s with style and class. My college years weren't so glamorous as I was living that broke college student lifestyle. Now that I am living a little bit more comfortably I can upgrade my style as I desire. So far I've been doing okay with this new goal except, I keep buying dresses and rompers yet I only wear them when I go out partying. How silly of me, right? From now on, I'm sticking to only buying new tops and bottoms! However, here are some goodies I purchased over the last week that I am loving.

 

Anyone else obsessed with black? Just another habit I need to break!

JULY WRAP-UP & AUGUST GOALS

Happy August! Its the last month of summer. To me summer has already peaked and is coming downhill due to the fact that friends have already left San Diego. I am seriously going to miss them so much, it really just isn't going to be the same. But there are still many summer days to enjoy and so much more to do. I hope August is as good to me as June and July have been.

In July I started a new job, went to Disneyland, drove up to San Francisco, spent time with friends, experienced some Comicon madness,  swallowed glitter at the pride parade, signed up for a new gym, and started taking Spanish classes. Overall, July was a pretty big month and I got to squeeze in a lot of fun. I've slowly been settling back into my "old" life and enjoying every part of it. This month I want to keep up all the fun while creating more of a routine for my day to day life. July has also brought out crazy amounts of inspiration and positivity (it has to be all that sunshine!) But I will elaborate on that later. Some of my August Goals include:

Be able to run a 5k comfortably again

Gym 2x-3x a week

Continue my Spanish classes

 Attend Redcross Orientation

Become better in my new position

 Sign-up to Volunteer at my Church

Research a certificate/masters degree in water resources/management

Research/Look into public health volunteer opportunities abroad

Try stand up paddle boarding

Plan dates for the Bay Area & New York

Get a henna tattoo

Make at least one new friend to hangout with

Okay maybe I am trying to do too much in August. It seems like a lot, but a lot is just incorporating things into a routine. I really want to start volunteering again, even if it just once or twice a month. What are your goals for August?